'Go away, I'm halfway through painting that Rush album on my wall'
Middle
aged men thought to have read books when younger are set to demonstrate at the
weekend over the shocking state of Britain. ‘The recession is a nod in the
right direction,’ said cyberpunk aficionado Brian Tool, ‘but otherwise society
has yet to descend into the urban chaos we were promised in the 1980s.’ Using
the internet – which the lobby complains has been undermined by people who
can’t spell – the march intends to force the government to be lot more
secretive in its dealings with shadowy-corporations. Also for corporations to
be a lot more shadowy. ‘Look,’ Mr Tool went on to say, ‘it’s no good if smart
technology involving phones and personal computers has entered every pocket and
every home if it then just becomes all too ordinary. I tried hacking into the
local council database last year and a policeman came round and asked me to
stop. He should have shot me.’
Whilst already the coalition have
promised to unveil exciting new cyber-related initiatives set to reduce the
home counties to something a bit more like Blade Runner by 2015, Labour leader
Ed Milliways has been quick to point out that he sounds like something a bit
like might have been in Hitch Hikers Guide To The Galaxy, ‘And that’s pretty
cyber isn’t it?’ the leader of the opposition declared from inside his big
leather trench coat.
Mr Tool, an IT Manager from Stevenage,
has promised the virtual presence of millions at Parliament Square this
Saturday, threatening that heads will roll when enough people like his proposal
on Facebook. ‘When oh when will the so-called leaders of this country realise
that what is lacking from society is a lot more pollution,’ then, ‘and chrome
lovebots.’
Well we've definitely got the Blade Runner rain and closed down shopping centres and take away vans on every corner. Hoodies on bikes, old ladies with cats - oh no thats me - shortage of scrap metal and a prime minister with a shiny head who looks plastic.
ReplyDeleteI'd prefer if we went for WestWorld myself. I did have a thing for Yul Bryner.
You'd skip the faux-Roman robot orgy in order to be chased by the Terminator Mk.1?
ReplyDeleteWell only 'cos he was Yul Brynner. We all have our weaknesses.
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