On the other hand, there's always everyone's-favourite-Goth
Now
just as we know they’re all kids books, so too have many of us read them.
Astonished as we are at our strange determination and somehow wondering why we
didn’t give up after the third? When then it would have been a perfectly fine
children’s series. Not Alan Garner, nor Susan Cooper, and certainly not Philip
Pullman, but for those of us that read as children how could we not, despite
the rising hype? And how did we sigh as they got worse, and how we knew really
that it was never going to shape up, or that love would be a power and a reason
all of its own?
But how could it have been better? And
why should I say that it can be? Well, I can try. And in this perhaps there
would have been something more. A reveal, a darker twist, something more in
keeping with characters then in their late teens, because late-teens aren’t
children and don’t really need books to their age.
So just for a moment let us suppose...
...it was all a lie.
The Order of the Phoenix was not just
good because it was, but rather it was made up of people who were fighting a guerrilla
war. That had to make stark choices, desperate choices. So they took young
Harry and made him a trap. They bound into the baby a counterspell, it can be a
powerful one, it might have taken all manner of effort.
They couldn’t have stood up to Voldemort, clearly. Even if all his
silly disciples had a bloody tattoo on them, so not so very secret after all.
And hidden as the Potter’s were one person had the key to their hidey-hole, as
it says, and that person was Wormtail who they knew was betraying them –
probably because he was a bit ugly or something. And they made him the
whatever-it-was that held the secret to where the Potter’s were hiding because
they knew he would tell the enemy. And the enemy came.
James Potter was in on it. He’s always
been portrayed frankly as being a wanker, bullying, and superior. But Lilly
didn’t know, and doubtless found out so ran to her baby and when Voldermort
arrived, died. James too because he might be a complete tool but Lilly was his
wife and we can assume he loved her. And so Voldermort because he’s just plain
bad, m’kay, clearly had to use a death spell on a baby instead of just punting
him through the window.
But baby Harry was a trap, and Voldemort
for once was not all powerfully defending himself – no more than a Roman would
have his shield up when stabbing a baby. So then and only then the counter spell
not only rebounded Voldermort’s curse, but caught him with his defences down,
Probably guffawing.
Dumbledore knew of course, so did they
all. The baby was taken away, probably so that those amongst the Phoenix who
were appalled at what they had done could not then blab it all out when faced
with him. Sirius went mad with it. Of course then as Harry grew the old members
of the Phoenix were always so nice to him, always saying how brilliant his
parents were. But it was a lie, and in fighting evil they had done evil.
Until Harry finds out in the last book.
And everything is turned on its head. And he’s a very angry teenager indeed,
spitting on Dumbledore’s grave in the process.
So there’s a reveal. And a series of
children’s books that by seeing them grow should surely have done so too with
the readers, utterly surprising everyone. Who knows what then might have
happened, but certainly everyone thinks wow and looks back and notices that
everything makes a lot more sense.
Certainly compared to why a rich kid,
the school sport champion, hero of all, seemed to have such a hard time at
school. Unlike those nerds in Hufflepuff anyway.
That took ten minutes.
I couldn't get through the first book because the standard of writing was so bad - and that was before all the major hype took off.
ReplyDeleteHad you been writing them then there would have been something to read that wasn't Enid Potter and a programme that you can put in all the names ect and it works out a plot for you - actually that would have come up with a reasonable plot. I would have read bad writing with a good plot and good writing with a bad plot but not double bad.
Something as good as you suggest if only at the end would not have tempted me beyond the first. There needs to be more meat on the bone. I'm not so hungry I'll wear my teeth out on a bare bone getting to the marrow.
Ten minutes you say. Well then, here, have 530 million quid.
ReplyDeleteThough we're going to dock you 10 million because the first 50 pages of the first one were a bit like Roald Dahl made with weak lemon squash and because we liked The Worst Witch (but only the first one). What's that ? Alan Garner's written a third book, doesn't he know books come in sevens. Well if Colin is a professor he'll be a bit like Dumbledore then, or Gandalf or that one out of Narnia.